![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Anniversaries
Aug. 17th, 2003 03:47 pmI guess, what it all comes down to on relationships, romance, love, is that I have my sights set too high.
Tomorrow is my parents' thirtieth wedding anniversary. My grandma and grandpa were married 60 years before my grandmother's death. My aunts and uncles have similar track records. I have one cousin that's been married and divorced twice - the rest are either single, without signfigant others, or have been married for years.
And I know my parents are not perfect people, nor is their marriage perfect. They fight, they argue, but when it comes down to it, they each love the other so dearly that they simply can not concieve of life apart.
I want a love like that. I want someone I can be angry at and know they won't leave me for it. I want a love that's robust, that can heal.
I've never had that. Every relationship I'm in, I'm terrified of doing something wrong, and in the end, I do, and it's the end of it all. But I want someone who will love me for thirty years, even when I'm unreasonable, who will love me in thirty years, even when I'm harsh or cynical or bitter. What happened to this kind of ever-after love with people that are willing to accept you as human with flaws?
Tomorrow is my parents' thirtieth wedding anniversary. My grandma and grandpa were married 60 years before my grandmother's death. My aunts and uncles have similar track records. I have one cousin that's been married and divorced twice - the rest are either single, without signfigant others, or have been married for years.
And I know my parents are not perfect people, nor is their marriage perfect. They fight, they argue, but when it comes down to it, they each love the other so dearly that they simply can not concieve of life apart.
I want a love like that. I want someone I can be angry at and know they won't leave me for it. I want a love that's robust, that can heal.
I've never had that. Every relationship I'm in, I'm terrified of doing something wrong, and in the end, I do, and it's the end of it all. But I want someone who will love me for thirty years, even when I'm unreasonable, who will love me in thirty years, even when I'm harsh or cynical or bitter. What happened to this kind of ever-after love with people that are willing to accept you as human with flaws?
